Changing Up Your Story
I think one of our misconceptions is we don’t change. While it can be comforting to feel like we’ve figured ourselves out, Sometimes we unknowingly trap ourselves inside a single story or long held belief. A story that the world, our culture, or even a store assistant, may have written for us.
I remember once walking into a department store and asking to try on a new fragrance, Dolce & Gabbana. I wanted to experiment with a different vibe. The store assistant took one look at me and said, “Nope, you’re a Hugo Boss girl.”
I get it, sporty, yes, that was a part of me. But it’s not all of me. That moment stuck with me because it showed just how quickly we can get boxed into identities. Not maliciously, but habitually.
In narrative therapy, there’s a powerful idea that we are not just one story, we are made up of many. We have dominant stories that often take the spotlight, but behind those are quieter ones that also deserve air time. And exploring these other stories, the ones we haven’t lived fully yet, can be freeing, healing and might need more space at different times in our lives.
Lately, I’ve been going to Yin Yoga classes. This might not sound revolutionary, but for someone who has lived in the world of being an athlete with structured sets and striving performance goals, this is very new. Yin is slow, spacious, quiet and non-judgement. And surprisingly, I love it. I feel like this is something I’m moving into that doesn’t “fit” my usual identity but is becoming my new norm. And it doesn’t erase my past, it expands me to this next phase in my life.
I believe it’s okay, in fact, essential, that we try on new identities. That we allow ourselves to explore a side we’ve neglected or been too shy to own. Life isn’t meant to be lived in one fixed style.
Yes, branding is important in business. But when it comes to your life? You’re allowed to change. You’re allowed to be a “Hugo Boss girl” and still spritz on a little Dolce & Gabbana when the mood hits.
So, maybe consider:
What identity or part of you have you been curious about, but haven’t given yourself permission to try?
Maybe it’s a dance class. A different way of dressing. A new spiritual practice. Or a whole new career chapter.
You’re not flaky for evolving. You’re human.
You’re allowed to change your story!
Kelly Perry
BAppSc, PostgradCertBusAdmin, PostgradCertPolSt, DipCounselling
